Sunday, February 27, 2011
Appearance: Runny honey. Golden Syrup (served in a Boddingtons glass)
Would you buy 2? Only to avoid Boddingtons itself.
Rating (out of 7): 2
Taste: soapy and watery, yet I do not feel clean inside. Like licking a slate. Quite stoney. Mountain wall.
Appearance: a good looking golden. Head leaves a wonderful foamy finger print on the glass as you drink. Wonderful!
Would you buy 2? Yeah. I need a wash.
Would you buy 4? I do t think I could Handle four. It'd be a dull afternoon. I'd like to look at four though!!
Rating (out of 7): 4**** appearance got this one another point!
Taste: creme cheese. Mellow and smooth. Like a nice pillow. Definitely quite creamy. It's slithering around my tongue.
Appearance: cloudy Amber.
Would you buy 2? yes, for a creamy treat!
Would you buy 4? I could but it'd be boring.
Rating (out of 7): 4**** unanimous
Taste: Golden sweetness in my mouth. Zesty. Mmm.
Appearance: lucozade. Browny
Would you buy 2?: most definitely. For a refreshing time
Would you buy 4?: I could enjoy 4 of this. 4 would slip down
Rating: a very generous 5
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Taste: Satay sauce explosion! Peanut heaven. I'm liking it.... Why is it nutty??? Is there a good part of an ashtray? It's a little smokey, in a pleasant way. This is a nice break from the norm.
Appearance: peanut brown.
Would you buy 2? Have and would again.
Would you buy 4? Why not!!!?
Rating (out of 7): 5***** an outstanding ale! Well done Northumberland, it doesn't just taste brown.
Taste: flat prunes.cockles and whelks. Surprisingly nice and smooth. Good, solid. I can do this one like a trouper!
Appearance: looks a little dark. I'm swaying.
Would you buy 2? This food smell's making me hungry. In a drought.
Would you buy 4? In s severe one. Yeah I could do it
Rating (out of 7): 4**** calibration maximus
Taste: there's something going on!!! Wow. Tasty. Cod!! Fish and chipsy! This would go great with a yeasty beer batter. Dandelion and burdock overtones. General sounds from mr. Barry Island.
Appearance: whoa!!! Green. Or is it? Yellowy brown. Like beige jaundiced skin, but in a nice way.
Would you buy 2? Might as well!!!
Would you buy 4? I be inclined to consider it!
Rating (out of 7): 5***** yeah!!! Nicely calibrated!!!
Friday, February 25, 2011
Taste: full flavoured! Nice! Chocolatey, malty. All good. There isn't anything unpleasant about this and that's a pleasant surprise.
Appearance: dark rubies
Would you buy 2? Yeah! And some money goes to charity too. That's good right?
Would you buy 4? I'd drink 4. I'd be hard pushed to drink 6. I'm impressed by this ale, but not Bowled over.
Rating (out of 7): ***** tasty. Couldn't push to the 6 though as it's not ground breaking.
Location:The badger set, Clapham common
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Taste: milk and a lifetime's hard graft. Lactose. It ages you...
Appearance: Yellow in disguise.
Would you buy 2? I did, by mistake. Never again.
Would you buy 4? Jesus. Not in this life/body.
Rating (out of 7): 2** not as interesting as a 3
Taste: Nothing happens at first, and then BLAM! It hits you in a subtle, beautiful way.
Appearance: Stormy. Not sure it's meant to be. Oh well.
Would you buy 2?: Yes
Would you buy 4?: No. 4 of one ale is serious and I'm not serious about this ale.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Taste: fizzy metal. Kind of lagery. But I chose it to go with a curry. So it's all worked out splendidly! Still, uninspired taste.
Appearance: no head. Yellow. Translucent.
Would you buy 2? If they served them in curry houses.
Would you buy 4? Your body would get over saturated and you may have to seek medical attention.
Rating (out of 7): 3*** not much flavour, but it serves a purpose
Location:The badger den, Clapham common
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Taste: like chewing crap school pencils. Not what I was hoping for at all. A bit like mouldy coffee And cockles. anoxic silage.
Appearance: sickly ruby red. Murky.
Would you buy 2? Unfortunately we bought five of them.... Bugger!
Would you buy 4? Never again. What a shocking mistake.
Rating (out of 7): 2** and that's just... Just like I said to Tim at the bar "use mine to review it and buy something nicer."
AtTEntion!!!! Four ales left unfinished and rejected. One left with Lego in and one returned to the bar (successfully) for an ale swap as it was undrinkable!!!! See photos.... Downgraded to ZERO STARS!!!!! Official!!!!!!!!
Location:Arts institute, Cardiff.
Taste: like a Sunday afternoon. Smells like lucozade. Cloves. Fermented marmalade?
Appearance: old honey. Yes.
Would you buy 2? Yeah, I think I would.
Would you buy 4? I would. I think I would too if there was nothing better.
Rating (out of 7): 4 not much debate about this one, apart from the egg ale lover...
Taste: amazing! Volcanic. Like being a soldier in a dippy egg breakfast. pretty sulphuric, so if you like eggy ales, this is for you. A lingering latex nose.
Appearance: golden egg
Would you buy 2? Yeah!!! For sure!!! I love egg! Hang on, don't you like egg?
Would you buy 4? No, I don't like egg!!!
Rating (out of 7): 3*** the most split vote ever!!! I wanted to give it 5, with one other person. Longest mathematical debate in the history of the ale guide. Unbelievable. Great ale debate!
Taste: breaded lemons. Refreshing batteries. Side by side. Shrugs. I like it! So wet! 100% saturation levels. My 4th eye is wide open.
Appearance: Amber on a traffic light and a bit of honey.
Would you buy 2? Double it!
Would you buy 4? See last question.
Rating (out of 7): 4**** good after a bike ride.
Taste: it's time to keep your appointment. My ale mind's been erased. A voyAge of discovery. Deep and rich. Anything else? No. Hang on, nose bleedy. Blood.
Appearance: golden. Urine in a gravy boat.
Would you buy 2? Goes well with jazzies, not snowies, so no.
Would you buy 4? No, not sick.
Rating (out of 7): 3. Not offensive just boring. But with a jazzie who knows...
Friday, February 18, 2011
Taste: Raw. Has not completed fermentation. So weird. Marmite!!!! Yeast!!! Not so enjoyable. An unformed butterfly.
Appearance: ale + war = bad
Would you buy 2? Celebrating war with beer is NEVER a good thing.
Would you buy 4? The death of innocent people in an air raid is not to be celebrated!!!
Rating (out of 7): 1* an unhinged review.
Taste: burnt plum pudding with candle wax. It's quite waxy with a touch too much cider vinegar. Bin left in the sun, perhaps since Xmas. Promising virgin gulp.
Appearance: boxing day. Slight stinging of tongue and throat.
Would you buy 2? Just sad looking.
Would you buy 4? Not even with gift vouchers
Rating (out of 7): 2 ** makes me feel like Scrooge. Xmas bad.
Taste: slightly flavourless satsumas. It's wainwrong. Accidental embibing of bird poo and diluted screenwash.
Appearance: boring. Broken kneed man on front using it as an antiseptic.
Would you buy 2? Maybe, if I es stuck with a broken knee.
Would you buy 4? I might stay on for four if I couldn't move on.
Rating (out of 7): 3*** not exquisitely lovely
Taste: Pig sty. Oh dear. Not a fitting tribute to Ron McNair. Uriah foam. Slurry pit. I feel like I'm being made to drink it by jarre.
Appearance: terribly disappointing.... Like ron's piece.
Would you buy 2? Not even for my last drink before it went up. I'd rather have a squash.
Would you buy 4? Only to commemorate Ron. But even then.
Rating (out of 7): 2 pure disappointment.
A Happier Drinker?
Taste: airy yeast. Just bitter and slightly citrusy. A bit like biscuits without any sugar. As it's coming toward your lips it's delicious, then when it hits... Not. The writing's too small! And the logo looks the same as ASK pizza. No info about jack either. Bad.
Appearance: looks like asda basics. Yellow brown hybrid.
Would you buy 2? Not this time.
Would you buy 4? Not this time.
Rating (out of 7): 3*** get in the drawer
Taste: tastes like gingerbread, a bit. Or maybe..... Treacle tart.
Appearance: treacle tart
Would you buy 2? No, I don't like treacle tart.
Would you buy 4? For someone that does like Treacle tart.
Rating (out of 7): 3*
Taste: really fermented... Plums! Bit like mum's molasses tart. Ale kit syrup. I'll make some homebrew from this.
Appearance: Imposing. Ominous. Owd Roger looks secretive.
Would you buy 2? To trick a friend, yes.
Would you buy 4? That's going to far.
Rating (out of 7): 3*** the HARDEST review ever! Has split the critics.
See another review for Owd Roger Here
After it was noted that this tasted like strong cheese I decided to make pies from a pint of the stuff. I can tell you that it's a 5 star pie ale. Keep your cooking boozy!
Taste: drip tray chic. Chocolate sheep dip. Mmmm weak solvent. Engine oil.
Appearance: looks good in that glass. Refer to picture.
Would you buy 2? Nooioooooo
Would you buy 4? Only if my tractor needed fueling
Rating (out of 7): 2 we're thrown off.
Taste: sharp! Mallowy! Delicious. Lovely! Sticky toffee! Nods all round
Appearance: like the sunset from Trans.
Would you buy 2? Yes we have. What an amazing album.
Would you buy 4? I would. Could happen. There's 4 people
Rating (out of 7): 5 I'm nervous
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Taste: I know it's nice, but I can't taste much. It's the chilli, you see. From the Thai meal. One person is saying "it won't stay on my Tongue long enough to taste."
Appearance: foamy, teak like Dickinson.
Would you buy 2? I have. Refer to photo.
Would you buy 4? Too light spirited. Spectral. (post Thai food)
Rating (out of 7): 4**** welcome to easy drinking country!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Taste: taste = 0. it's irony is that the 'smooth' in it's name refers to it's ghostliness as a plus point. 1758? People have really drunk this for a long time. No imagination.
Appearance: flat, brown lager
Would you buy 2? Never!!!!
Would you buy 4? No!!! It was free with a £5 meal. Never make me!
Rating (out of 7): 1* sadly zero is not acceptable.
Appearance: Amber light just before it's time to stop.
Would you buy 2? With a summer's day board game.
Would you buy 4? I long for a hearty handshake ale not a sly sideways glance ale.
Rating: * * * * Four stars just!
Appearance: Cloudy set honey from a far away farm shop.
Would you buy 2? I was preparing to dislike it, but yes, yes I would.
Would you buy 4? Sharing a cheese platter.
Rating: * * * * * Good show!
Taste: delicious salt bread taste! Surprise! Caramel. Fullers are blowing my mind, in a very soft kind of way. Kind of patting it down with a wet cloth.
Appearance: mahogany. Like an antique armchair or a grandfather clock.
Would you buy 2? Oh boy! Yes!!!
Would you buy 4? I really think I could this time. Look mum, I'm really doing it!
Rating (out of 7): 5***** for sheer drinkability.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Appearance: a pleasing label. Fiery brown
Would you buy 2?: I think I'd buy two but I don't know if I'd buy four.
Would you buy 4?: with 3 friends why not? For yourself? Hmmm... I really like it.
Rating: 5. I'm just a harsh critic
Appearance: gold of course. Golden coins. A roman brooch.
Would you buy 2?: most definitely. Between us we have.
Would you buy 4?: there's more ales in the ale shop
Rating: an average of 4
Appearance: hard to tell through the bottle. Probably brown. I can confirm that it is brown, but not that brown. Yellowy.
Would you buy 2?: a sigh of apathy
Would you buy 4?: no. No. No.
Rating: 2. Not offensive but very very bland
Appearance: murky, cloudy, like brackish water
Would you buy 2?: I wish I hadn't
Would you buy 4?: only 3 after a night on the rum
Rating: 2. All are calibrated perfectly
Taste: mmmm! Wow! Coffee cream! Horses tails! Creamy creamy!
Appearance: got much much darker as it settled. A pleasing dark brown. Like magic
Would you buy 2?: yeah, yeah
Would you buy 4?: too early to tell. Not a session ale I'm feeling
Rating: 4**** It's interesting. We're calibrated well
Appearance: transparent orange. Hard to read through
Would you buy 2?: hmmm.... Ummm..... It's in the balance
Would you buy 4?: let's be honest, no.
Rating: 3. A solid if unspectacular pint
Friday, February 11, 2011
Taste: digestive biscuits. Spring water and celery.
Appearance: cloudy brown
Would you buy 2? Yeah. Draught is better.
Would you buy 4? No! Better things from sambrooks
Rating (out of 7): 4**** pretty tasty!
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Taste: Definite hint of dandelion and burdock and lots of watery smoke. It's all so mild.... Not an ale to be afraid of! You just drink it and it's gone, with memories few and far between. A strange dreamlike ale.
Appearance: Dark brown labrador
Would you buy two? You might, then you would instantly forget.
Would you buy four? Shhhhhh.
Rating: * * * (but a good three!)
Taste: Light and airy, I could imagine chosing this as an oxygen substitute if forced to in the future. Thirst quenching but quite bland, like overly diluted lemon squash, without the lemon. A marathon runner would choose this after a strenuous jog. Doesn't taste like piss despite the name. A plus point.
Appearance: Casual brown.
Would you buy 2? Whilst partaking is some light sport (i.e. game of rounders) perhaps.
Would you buy 4? No, there's more to life.
Rating: * * *. A solid three. One for the summer?
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Taste: hint of toilet. Barley and honey. Familiar. Izal toilet paper from the 50's. Broccoli taste. Treacley tongue. We've got a 9volter! (tastes like putting your Tongue on a 9 volt battery). What's that taste..... MALT
Appearance: mushy. Cloudy. Tate and lye's golden syrup. Dinosaur blood.
Would you buy 2? Not today. Maybe as a trick for an enemy,
Would you buy 4? No. I'd have to be heavily pressured into this. At gunpoint.
Rating (out of 7): 3*** get in the drawer of average ales. Sick!
Taste: smooth, not really strong tasting at all. It might even be.... Lemon!!! Or citrus. Yes. Citrus.
Appearance: Amber. That's safe.
Would you buy 2? Yes.
Would you buy 4? No. Laughs*
Rating (out of 7): 3* middle of the road. Not a session beer!